Tonight as I was preparing my Monday classes, I decided to use an excerpt from a book I read many years ago. I still open the book to this particular part from time to time and reread the beautiful
I will love these words forever and ever.
It is funny the things that you miss. Art and I used to have a little ritual if one of us was frosted about something and we couldn't sleep. I can't even remember how it began. I think it was something left over from his childhood. When someone was peeved up, or things were rough, the other one would fix a snack. It was always the same snack: a Cadbury Fruit & Nut bar and two glasses of milk. And we always ate it in bed. We usually kept a chocolate bar handy in case of an emergency. Once or twice when we didn't have one on hand, Art went out and got one at MacDonnell's and brought it home and we would have our little picnic.
About three months after he died, I was cleaning behind the bed and I found a chocolate bar hidden on his side of the headboard. We have a bed with a dresser and mirrors built in on either side. There are cubbyholes over the dresser, and I found the chocolate bar tucked at the back of one of the cubbyholes. It really tied my buns in a knot. I wanted to have a picnic right then and there but I didn't have my picnic partner. I must have cried over that stupid chocolate bar for three months.
One night I finally decided I either had to eat it before the worms got to it or I had to throw it out. So I decided to have a picnic on my own. I went downstairs and got the tray out and a glass of milk and fixed everything just right and came upstairs. I got into bed and opened up the chocolate bar but there was no chocolate in it. Art had eaten the chocolate and folded up Kleenex and wrapped it all up again with a note. "Sorry. But I was hungry. It was truly delicious. Love you Art." I had bawled over that chocolate bar for weeks--and I was bawling again and all I had was a handful of Kleenex to wipe my nose with.
I knew I had to do something with it. I got up and wrapped it just the way Art had, and I put on my jacket over my nightie and I went out to the garage and got a garden stake, and I nailed the wrapper to the stake, and then I drove up to the cemetery and I hammered the sucker in right besides his tombstone. I laughed and laughed while I did it.
On the way home I stopped at MacDonnell's and I bought myself a Cadbury Hazelnut bar. I never really liked the Fruit & Nut bar all that much. I didn't favour the raisins, but Art did and I never said anything. So I bought the hazelnut bar and had a hazelnut picnic. I sat in bed eating that bar and laughing so hard there were tears coming down my face.